Trust is something one provides to another in a very real sense. You cannot compel someone to believe in you. However, you may create an atmosphere where that other person will be more inclined to trust you. You achieve this by developing your credibility reviews . However, being trustworthy entails a little more than simply following through on your promises.
To trust, you need to have two things. One relates to proficiency and readiness. The other involves thinking about the other person’s best interests. You cannot be trusted even if you carry out what you promise to do or refrain from acting as you promise. Being trustworthy extends the idea further.
Making commitments you don’t plan to keep is one of the barriers to being believed to be trustworthy.
The next time you are in town, we must meet up.
As soon as I finish everything else requiring my attention, I’ll get to that.
My personal favourite is probably “I shall pray for you.”
Now, if the individuals who say these kinds of things share a shared understanding, great. In the first scenario, if both parties are aware that it is merely an act of politeness and that there are no real plans to “get together” any time soon, then so be it.
But what if one of them genuinely accepts that as truth? What if they believe you two will actually “get together”? When it doesn’t, they could even feel deceived, especially if they learn that you visited the area but didn’t get in touch with them.
So, never make a commitment you don’t intend to keep if you want to establish a reputation for being trustworthy. Don’t make a meeting promise if you know it won’t happen, even if it is the courteous thing to do. These “off the cuff” promises could cause the other person to have higher expectations than you intended, and that is not a good approach to develop a reputation for being trustworthy.
People are able to get away with making those kinds of promises in part because they are ambiguous and non-committal. So, for instance, if someone promises something to you and you are waiting for them to do it “when they get through everything else requiring their attention,” they frequently give the justification that they have been “too busy.” Making your commitments very clear is the second component of being trustworthy. You must establish boundaries if you are truly devoted to keeping a promise and earning the praise that goes along with it. This necessitates learning how to negotiate, which is a subject for another day.
Being detailed demonstrates your dedication to the partnership. Therefore, instead of saying “when I get around to it,” agree on a realistic and acceptable timetable. By focusing on the specifics, you accomplish two goals:
You can judge how committed the other party is to the project.
You have a reasonable expectation that the promise will be kept.
You might discover that your hopes are unrealistic. You can discover that the other person isn’t as dedicated to the task. By being very explicit, you can make alternative arrangements, even to the extent of hiring someone else to complete the work, if necessary. That must be much more acceptable in the long run than failing to do tasks when you need them to.
On rare occasions, you may discover that the conditions of a commitment you made prevent you from keeping a promise you made. It does occasionally happen that new knowledge or unexpected events will arise. It is a natural part of existence. If something occurs and it will have an impact on commitments you’ve already made, it’s essential to give the other parties to the arrangement as much advance notice as you can of your inability to keep your end of the bargain. When presented with such a circumstance, many people have a tendency to put things off until the last minute, which leads to a variety of issues that could have been avoided.
The obligations you make but don’t follow through on come last. Accept your responsibility for your actions rather than trying to escape responsibility and, along with the other parties engaged in the initial commitment, look into ways to make up for the repercussions.
